A second-generation Filipino American born and raised in Arlington, Virginia, Hazel Saunders—better known as Shady Haze—was blessed with the origin story of an art-loving dad and dancer mother who were supportive of her love of cosplay and LGBTQ+ identity. From her first pink Mighty Morphin Power Rangers outfit at age 7, to superhero Marvel-D.C. cosplays, her costumes weave a tapestry of labor and pride.
“Not everyone has the same perspective and experience in being Filipino or Filipino American,” Shady Haze told attendees at the “Fil-Am Identity, Cosplay & Mental Health” panel at New York Comic Con earlier this month. “But they have experiences that are valid. They have burnout and happiness in cosplaying.”
Spiffy in her green Iron Fist cosplay, with Filipino sashes designed by a commissioned Australian artist, Shady Haze moderated a menagerie of costumed panelists: Dr. Gerro (the dogman Raww from Forgotten Island), IzieBuilds (the Dark Knight), Brolicpump (Spider-Man), and Maweezy (a Filipino-themed Street Fighter). Prior to the panel, Shady Haze juggled other adventures and side quests, hosting and striking hero poses at a Spider-Verse cosplay meetup and videorecording a dance party at the Filipino cosplay meetup, where a fan might have received a sticker from a Ned “CEO of Sex” cosplayer or crashed into an individual in hulking Fallout body armor.
Right after moderating mental health discussions, Shady Haze and I teamed up for a herculean task: finding a stable interview spot in an overstimulated crowd on the third day of the convention. Our conversation consisted of surviving cosplaying, burnout, and the generative AI era. And our conversation made me feel better about not wearing an intricate cosplay, but rather opting for a scrappy, colored-pencil-scrawled name tag that identified me as “Orpheus” from Hadestown.
This interview has been edited for clarity and length.
Caroline Cao: What was your first costume?
Shady Haze: Pink Ranger from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I loved action sequences. I also had a costume of Tommy as the White Ranger. I always wanted to see myself on the big screen doing martial arts.
CC: What was the point in your life where you went, “I’m going to do cosplay and talk about mental health?”
SH: When I first started cosplay in 2018, I looked at social (to search) “how to make certain armor.” I reached out to cosplayers and creators and it was helpful to get guidance. But also, a self-starter myself, the process of making costumes and props does take a toll on your mental health because you need to have balance in work, life, and school. I started thinking about how I could advocate for Asian Americans when mental health is a key issue in health.
CC: Your cosplay panelists mention day jobs—some of them in health care. Do you have a day job?
SH: I tell everyone I’m not social media “24/7,” but “25/8.” I’m on social media all the time, from 9 to 5, from 5 to 9. I work in data and software as a social media manager and creator, so I create content in that niche industry. And when I’m not working on my full-time day job, I’m working on creator advocacy and content education in cosplay. It’s a good balance because I can turn my brain on and off with different industries and try out different campaigns and social media techniques. So I’m on social media day and night.
CC: What was the worst burnout you underwent?
SH: It’s very tough. Burnout is different for everyone. For me, to survive burnout, whenever there’s a convention, I try to plan three months ahead of time. Last year I did not do that and I burnt out so much. And we were two weeks away from the convention, to survive, I said to myself, “It’s okay I’m not done. It’s okay that it’s halfway done. I’m still gonna wear it cause it’s still a work in progress, and I want people to see the hard work to put in.” With my Pink Ranger Mandalorian, you have to sand, you have to prime, you have to paint, you have to weather.
CC: Did you complete it by another convention?
SH: Oh yeah! I took another month to look at the mechanics that weren’t working: velcro versus straps, versus zippers. At the last New York Comic Con, I wore it for the first time and I could tell what mobility I had because I want my costume to work when walking around 10,000 steps. I can tell what certain pieces were falling apart, I made notes on how to fix them. Two weeks after, I debuted the cosplay for a group photo.
CC: How much did the Pink Ranger Mandalorian cost?
SH: It was the hardest! It was a kit, meaning it had 3-D-printed material. About $300 for the armor and $100 for the base costume. With paint and priming, it cost another $40 dollars. Overall, about $500.
CC: And you had a Spider-Man costume yesterday at a Spider-Verse meetup.
SH: When it came to that costume itself, I didn’t know how to sew so I commissioned a website to do the sewing itself. I have friends who help me 3-D print and design it. They have more of an expertise. It’s always a collaborative project.
CC: On your social media, I see you often discuss generative AI.
SH: I do! Right now we’re living in a world where social media and AI are evolving at a rapid speed. To fight generative AI, you have to have your own narration. People trust human resources. So be a trust. Be a resource. So when the generative AI takes over in like five years, people know they can trust you because you know your knowledge because you’re human and know your stuff.
CC: I’m Vietnamese American, so I know generative AI and misinformation can be a problem in the AA+PI community.
SH: While I haven’t dealt with that family-wise, I do have people asking about generative AI, whether it’s images or writing. I always give advice, “Do some training. Look at different fonts. Look at different movies and videos. And look into sustainable AI [versus] generative AI.” You need to look at the material to study it. It’s good to be knowledgeable about it.
CC: For Filipino American History Month (FAHM), what’s a Filipino fact and/or person you wish someone to know about?
SH: Everyone should learn more about folklore history. A great way to learn more is watching Forgotten Island because it really shows the different folklore and mythology. I like the Manang (the vampire). The movie shows what part of her is human and what made her this way. A lot of people say that type of (entity) kills babies, so there is really hardcore lore.
CC: Any historical figure for FAHM that comes to your mind?
SH: Lea Salonga (who voices the Manang)! She was Miss Saigon. She (did the singing voices for) Mulan and Jasmine. She’s just an iconic figure all about community and living as Filipino.
